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Dragon Age: Origins PDF Print E-mail
Written by Silver Sorrow / Starfox   
Monday, 07 March 2011 00:00
Article Index
Dragon Age: Origins
The Hands Of Destiny
The Grey Wardens Wants You
Too Damn long to write here!
Talents, skills and other things
Character creation and other self-torments
All Pages

 

Dragon Age: Origins

 

It Has Begun...You're In The Hands Of Destiny

You have several choices for your character's background: human noble warrior, human noble rogue, human mage, elf mage, city elf warrior, city elf rogue, Dalish elf warrior, Dalish elf rogue, casteless dwarf warrior, casteless dwarf rogue, dwarf noble warrior, dwarf noble rogue. Further added to those is the choice of gender, which may alter certain details in each case. All that's missing is:

human commoner warrior
human commoner rogue
apostate human mage
apostate city elf mage
Dalish elf mage
Dalish elf warrior mage who knows how to pick a friggin' lock

Each origin story is at least interesting in construction: from the dispiriting world of the city elves and the casteless dwarves, to the Dalish life of eating bugs and wiping one's ass with poison sumac (judging by how friendly they are), to a life of privilege and comfortable shoes as a noble human or noble dwarf, to a life under the constant scrutiny of the Chantry, you'll find one you favor above the others. Unless there's something wrong with you. So whichever one you think is the "correct" story, they're all well-made.

 

And It Seemed We Were Getting Along So Well...

There are...three main races, I guess:

Dwarves are irritable fireplugs who can scratch their feet without bending over. A curious sense of aesthetics is at work here, and I hope someone crushes it with a hammer.

Elves are aggravating shorties with Spock ears. The elf implementation in DAO is definitely a notch above Bethesda's Wood Elf paradigm, however.

Humans are a bunch of hairy inbred racist rednecks with delusions of grandeur. (There are no human subraces, despite the skin color options. You're a honkey no matter what.)

Others include the Qunari, who are very tall, and...well, I guess that's it. So...four? Four, then.

In the not-quite-a-race category go the Darkspawn (ubiquitous monsters) and golems, which...well, never mind. You'll find out how they're made soon enough.

The Darkspawn are not quite a race, because they are all of them. Wow! that's profund... But you'll learn that soon enough too.

 

Dragon Age: Origins

 

Deorcspawne? Fiscstikkas!

You'll hear the term "Darkspawn" about as much as you'll hear the phrase "Grey Wardens" throughout the game. Both grate on the nerves after a while, to put it mildly. Take how many times they used "Spectre" and "Shepard" in Mass Effect and multiply that by a few million.

Side Note: I thought it would be funny to name my Mass Effect character either "Commander" or "Shepard," as that's what they call Shepard most of the time. Of course, I was totally wrong about the hugeness of the comedy value, so with this knowledge in mind I restrained myself from naming my DAO characters either "Grey" or "Warden." And forget the name "LuvAznCh1ks74" because that's just so very wrong.

The Darkspawn are a curious gaggle of soul-less monsters who delight in killing living things, not that I blame them (hey, I've been to Wal-Mart). They live underground and are battled constantly by the Dwarves, who just can't seem to find out what creates them so they can nip the problem in the bud.** They encompass several subgroups, each with its own commander-type variant (i.e., boss; a Hurlock Alpha, for example): Genlocks are short. Hurlocks are the size of humans. Sharlocks, or Shrieks, are pop-up-behind-you-causing-you-to-choke-on-your-granola-bar types. Ogres are very large. Very large indeed. And now they're all commanded by an Archdemon, which may very well be a dragon corrupted by their taint.
[** I find it ridiculous that these idiots have been fighting these things for centuries and can't figure out where the hell they're all coming from, but it only take me the course of an afternoon to find out the truth.]

Indeed, Dwarves occupy a central place in this game due to their relation to the Darkspawn. What Humans call a Blight, Dwarves call that the daily routine. Which is a good representation of humanity behavior in general. As long as a problem only concerns others, it doesn't exist. But when the said problem comes knocking at the door then it becomes worth fighting. If all the races in Thedas had taken arms to fight alongside Dwarves in the gloomy Deep Roads instead of ignoring the whole problem during the 4 centuries or so between each Blight, the Darskpawn would be eradicated already... But of course without Darkspawn there would be no Dragon Age either and your character would be in a bad situation of unemployement.

Let me backtrack a bit: there were a few really powerful dragons back in the days of yore, and they were known as the Old Gods. Subject to worship, tribute, mass phallic adoration, etc.; whether they were really gods or just supremely powerful dragons is a matter of conjecture. At any rate the Maker -- the absentee deity -- expelled them from dear old Draconian U or something and caused them to burrow deep into the earth and take really long naps...

There were 7 Dragons in total. In Dragon Age your character fight the 5th one called Urthemiel so a simple calculation allow us to predict that Bioware can release at least two other games, probably three as we already know that the upcoming Dragon Age 2 begins during the same Blight as Dragon Age: Origins and don't extend to another Blight although Darkspawns are still a thematic.

...don't ask ME if this sugar substitute should make any sense...

No problem. I don't.

...and so the Darkspawn, always on the lookout for prime leadership material, dig and dig and dig** until they find one of these old gods/dragons. Their taint immediately corrupts the poor lizard and it becomes the Archdemon. This Archdemon then leads the Darkspawn horde to the surface where they lay waste to the world, killing anything and everything they possibly can, as well as refusing to leave an adequate tip at their favorite bistros or say "excuse me" after belching the alphabet. Animals. The people call this a "Blight," although I would term it somewhat differently. "Frolicked Over By God" has a nice ring to it. Anyway, a Blight doesn't happen very often, every few hundred years or so, but it's something of an inconvenience when it does happen.
[** Grand. Now the "Dig-Dug" theme is stuck in my head.]

Which leads me to...
 



 

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